Is it aging or are we just stuck in stress?

The hidden reason behind slouched posture, shallow breathing, and feeling older than you are

When my dad was sick and dying, the years leading up to it were filled with layers of trauma. One summer, after long days of teaching, my low back pain became unbearable.

I was strong, fit, and mobile. I was teaching movement every day. But it didn’t matter. My body was holding grief.

I went to an amazing massage therapist, and in the middle of our session he simply placed his hands on my stomach and held them there. Suddenly I felt a rush of energy. I asked what he did. He said, “sending you love.”

That moment cracked something open for me. It led me to somatic work, breathwork, and a deep dive into understanding the psoas. Over time, this approach healed my back, allowed me to process stress and trauma, and gave me the tools to ease the anxiety that was making me sick.

so what was happening?

There’s a reflex wired into every human body called the red light reflex. It is our primitive protector, the withdrawal reflex.

• head drops and chin tucks

• shoulders round forward

• chest collapses

• belly tightens

• pelvis tucks under

• breath becomes shallow

It is the same reflex animals use to survive. It is not just for them, it helps humans survive too. Curling toward a fetal posture is the body’s fastest way to protect the eyes, throat, heart and organs.

The reflex itself is not bad. It is protective. The issue is when we get stuck in it.

why it looks like aging

The red light reflex is not only triggered by big traumas. Everyday stress keeps it alive too.

• paying bills

• solving daily problems

• constant worry

• scrolling the news

• hours slumped at a desk or on devices

You can see it in kids curled over devices or from stress and anxiety. Their shoulders round, their chest collapses, their heads start to drop forward. Add time on screens and the pattern deepens even more.

Adults carry the same thing. The weight of anxiety, responsibility, and daily pressure builds, and over time it starts to look like aging.

• forward head and rounded shoulders

• collapsed chest

• wrinkled brow and crow’s feet

• dowager’s hump

• shallow breath

• aching joints

But this is not age. It is stress patterns repeated year after year.

what is happening inside

This posture is not just on the surface. Inside the body the abdominal wall stays tight, pulling ribs and pelvis closer together. The diaphragm cannot drop, so full breathing stops. Organs are compressed, circulation slows, constipation becomes common. Pressure builds on the bladder, sometimes making you feel like you need to pee when you do not. Shallow breath keeps the nervous system stuck in alert mode.

No wonder people feel tired, anxious, or in pain.

what I learned from my own body

At one point my clients started noticing I was rounding forward. They were actually fixing my alignment. For the first time in my life, I was caving in.

It was humbling and honestly a little embarrassing. But it showed me something important. Even with years of training, I was not immune. Stress had pulled me into the very pattern I was teaching others to avoid.

What taught me how to release it was learning how to breathe using my diaphragm, psoas releases, learning to live inside my body and allow it to become a safe space again, and breathing into the thoughts and feelings I was running away from.

the shift

Somatic movement, stomach rolling, and conscious breath taught me how to soften my belly, free my diaphragm, and reset my nervous system.

My back pain healed.My anxiety lightened.I finally had a tool I could use anytime to come out of a stressful moment or to turn my brain off at night.

my method: release reset revive

This was how my way of teaching and my method were eventually created. First you release tension and relearn how to breathe. Then you reset with mindful movement that restores alignment and strength. Finally you revive, moving freely in every direction to build resilience and stay young.

the takeaway

So much of what we think of as aging is really just the body stuck in a protective reflex. The good news is we can change it. Somatic work gives you the awareness to release tension, restore alignment, breathe fully, and come out of survival mode.

With love,

Regan